Year in Review

Well friends, it's the last Sunday of 2012. It's been a good, eventful year, so I am going to think back, month by month, on what happened.

January. In the beginning of the month, I said goodbye to my visiting nephews, Preston, Franklin, and Nathaniel (aka Baby), and went back to Provo and moved into West Cambridge #12. I had lived in the ward in 2011 and was fortunate enough to find another opening there when I started school again. My roommates were Bryton Beesley, Ammon Orgill, and Cameron Eaton. I took English Semantics and Pragmatics, taught by Dallin D. Oaks (my favorite professor ever); Beginning Piano Techniques Part 2, taught by a grad student named Randy; Basic Editing Skills, taught by Doris Dant; Doctrine and Covenants, taught by Barbara Morgan; and Physical Geology, taught by Steve Nelson. I also joined a student journal, Schwa, to get editing experience.

February. I went to a tri-ward dance and was a wall weed. This was the month of the terrible tragedy of that nefarious, abominable, diabolical Josh Powell. I coined the term lemits to refer to the really weird, often depressing time of year in late February and March. Ammon moved out of the apartment and was replaced by another Cameron, Cameron Haas.


March. One Sunday, while wearing a Snoopy St. Patrick's Day tie and watching a CES broadcast, I discovered that I have a double who sings in the choir at BYU-Idaho. I went to the St. Patrick's Day parade in Salt Lake City, even though I think parades are stupid. March 31 was the first time Salt Lake City ever hit 80 degrees during the month of March.


April. This was quite an eventful month. I went to Rock Canyon with my geology class a few days before Easter. Cameron Eaton got engaged and moved out for the summer, and Bryton became the elders quorum president. I finished winter semester with a 4.0. During the break between winter and spring, I wrote the longest blog post ever. My parents also took me to Vernal to see Dinosaur National Monument, which is one of the coolest places ever. I went back to Provo the day before spring classes. After a ward FHE activity of capture the flag, I went running for an hour. Well, it was meant to be an hour, but at 59 minutes I stopped because I didn't feel well. Next thing I knew, I was lying in the middle of the road with scraped knees and hands. I went to the Student Health Center the next day; apparently I just had low blood sugar. All my scrapes made it hard to walk for a week. I started spring classes, taking Print Publishing and History from 1500. I applied for an internship just because I could. On the last day of the month, I got a call to go in for an interview. I wasn't prepared for an interview, but I went in and got the job!

May. I can't remember if I got my new glasses in April or May. I started working at BYU Studies, my first article to edit being about baptism in the Book of Mormon. I got to watch the solar eclipse. A bunch of girls--Hanna, Suzy, Carissa, Kristen--started visiting us frequently. I started my memory blog. On the Friday before Memorial Day, my parents tried J-Dawgs for the first time (and have been hooked ever since) before we went and visited some amazing lava tubes near Fillmore. 

June. I got to see the transit of Venus. I had a completely dreadful final for my completely dreadful history class. I also had to do a final project for my Print Publishing class, but the printing place in the Wilk messed up my book. Between spring and summer terms, I went home and ended up completely tearing the mat of our trampoline. I contacted Jan Terri on Facebook, and she sent me burned copies of her CDs and and an autographed photo, which some horses took and framed. I sent her a check for $20. (Now all of her music is available for download, so I got a good deal.) I introduced all sorts of people to Jan Terri, and we even had a Jan Terri party in which we took my Jan Terri picture to the park and took pictures with "her."
I started summer term, taking French 321 from Daryl Lee, Book of Mormon from Byron Merrill, and Writings of Isaiah from Shon Hopkin.The last week of the month, my cousin Jesse got married and I was the best man, but that didn't really mean anything. My brother was moving to California, so I briefly got to see his family for the wedding.

July. I watched part of Provo's Fourth of July parade with Bryton, and then I went swimming with some of the horses later that day. We watched fireworks from the field by the MTC. The next day we went to a small performance of Cyrano de Bergerac; it felt like September that day. I went to a llama festival in Spanish Fork and discovered I don't really like animals. I went to an orthopedist because my knee hurt whenever I would run; he gave me some knee exercises to do, and now I can run again. My parents bought a giant TV that plays YouTube videos, but my dad misuses YouTube. A certain tarantula came and rearranged our apartment. I watched Olympics, even though I don't like sports. This was the month with the Aurora shooting catastrophe.

August. On August 1, I took most of my French class to a French bakery. That same day, I said goodbye to Hanna. I finished summer term with three A minuses. Then my dad and I took a train to California to visit my brother's family. Baby had an adorable catch phrase, "You inky!" We saw all sorts of touristy places, such as Muir Woods and the Golden Gate Bridge. But mostly we stayed home with my nephews. I flew home by myself after a week. I enjoyed my time off, but then it was time to go back to Provo. I got a calling as an assistant ward clerk. I started my first fall semester. I took Empirical Methods in English Linguistics from Nancy Turley, Varieties of English from Wendy Smemoe, Substantive Editing from Doris Dant (again), Environmental Biology from Richard Terry, Jogging from a coach named Josh, and Geomorphology from Jani Radebaugh. And then I got sick, even though I never get sick. Scott Boyce moved in during the break.

September. My parents came down one weekend and took me on an adventure to Cascade Springs. Then in the middle of the month, I was super excited to get ready for Halloween! It was my first Halloween with decorating my apartment, Mad Monster Party?, and, of course, "Get Down Goblin."
I went on a field trip to the Crandall Printing Museum. We all participated in the Brigham City Temple dedication, which was quite interesting in the Marriott Center. I had an impromptu birthday party with some of the horses and turned 24 the next day.

October.  I went to the final Rooftop Concert Series to see the Lower Lights, whose latest album I got for my birthday. In general conference, they announced the new missionary ages. On homecoming weekend, my grandparents came and took me to dinner and to the MOA. The mountain was absolutely beautiful. My parents took me to see Frankenweenie in the movie theater. It was a good movie; you should see it. I helped out at a Relief Society luncheon. On Halloween, I carved my pumpkin to protest the political sign outside our apartment complex.

November. I got a free trip to Death Valley! My Geomorphology class all went to Death Valley the first weekend of the month. We saw playas, volcanic craters, sand dunes, and moving rocks. It was great! I had some major tarantula problems. I had fun celebrating Thanksgiving and bought six bags of Thanksgiving candy (clearance Halloween candy that doubles as Thanksgiving candy). Thanksgiving was at our house this year, and it was pretty fun. Then I went back to Provo and had to buckle down for all the assignments and projects coming up.

December. I had to do four final projects and five finals. It was kind of stressful getting everything done. But I got it all done! Unfortunately, I ended the semester with two A minuses. Oh, well. I went to a caroling activity but was the only one to show up. Then I came home for the break. There was the terrible Connecticut tragedy. I saw Cherie Call at a live radio concert. We had an early Christmas and I got a new laptop, which I am presently using. Then this past week I have been in California to visit my nephews again. We went to Six Flags and Franklin got really mad at me because I accidentally splashed him with water, but he doesn't believe people do things on accident. Preston got baptized. Then we drove home!

"Because it's wintertime again,
And the last leaf falls on what has been, 
And as this year comes to an end,
I am thinking about starting again, again." 

Christmas Traditions

Have you ever noticed that we tend to talk about a lot of traditions at Christmas that aren’t really traditions anyone follows?

For example, I have never seen real holly used as a decoration. I have never been on a sleigh ride. I have never kissed under the mistletoe (thankfully). In fact, I hadn’t even seen mistletoe hanging until this year, and I doubt it was authentic mistletoe. (Did you know that mistletoe is a parasite? I don’t think that’s very Christmassy.) I’ve never had plum pudding or figgy pudding. I haven’t had a real Christmas tree since I was five years old. I’ve never gone caroling door to door, nor have I had any carolers come to my door. I’ve never used a real sock for a stocking. I’ve never roasted chestnuts on a fire. I don’t even know what chestnuts are!

This year was the first time for me for many traditions. It was the first time I’d ever had real wassail. I had it at others’ houses this year, so this week I made my own. I’m accustomed to making spiced cider for Thanksgiving and Christmas, so I just added some pineapple juice, orange juice, and nutmeg for wassail. This was the first year that I personally made gingerbread. And it was the first time I’ve ever had fruitcake. I was always surprised at all the jokes making fun of fruitcake—I think fruitcake jokes are more common than fruitcake actually is. After trying it, I can kind of understand why it gets such a bad rap. I found it really weird, and I don’t think I would eat it if it weren’t so closely associated with Christmas. Kind of like candy corn for Halloween and Thanksgiving, except that candy corn is better.

I suppose that as some traditions slowly fade away, it’s time for new traditions to come. But I don’t think the fad of “ugly sweater parties” is a tradition that should stay. It seems to me that ugly sweaters are kind of like fruitcake—there are more jokes and parties about them than there are actually sweaters. My North Salt Lake singles ward had an ugly sweater party this week. It was the first one I’d been to, but I know there are tons of them going on all the time. More than half of the people at the party weren’t wearing sweaters, including me. Of those who were, I only thought one sweater was actually ugly, and it wasn’t a Christmas sweater. I think a lot of the sweaters do have kind of an old lady feel to them, but I don’t think they were ugly. If I had a sweater like that, I would wear it, not even to an ugly sweater party. But then again, I wear holiday Snoopy T-shirts that are two sizes too big (I draw the line at three sizes too big—I just wear those to bed). The ugly sweater party was also a white elephant party. I like white elephant parties, even if I have no desire to keep a nerdy pirate card game.

A new tradition I think we should embrace is new Christmas music. I have often expressed my disdain for “Jingle Bell Rock.” I think the Davis County Clipper only hires ultra-conservative old fogies to write its columns. This week there was a columnist saying he didn’t like post-Nixon Christmas music. Which means he doesn’t like Paul’s wonderful Christmastimes or John’s happy war-is-over Christmases. Um, I think of those former Beatle songs as being too old and too overplayed. How can you possibly stand to listen to the same songs over and over again for FIFTY YEARS?!?!?

This week I was able to hear some good new Christmas music. My favorite singer, Cherie Call, was singing at the B 98.7 studios. This was a live mini concert, and I got to go. She’s great. She sang her non-holiday song “Holding On” with some added Christmas lyrics. She sang her poignant song “Gifts,” which is the title of her Christmas album. In response to the Connecticut tragedy, she sang her heartrendingly beautiful “Broken Hearts Like Mine.” She sang some non-Christmas songs, “Already a Butterfly” and “Big Yellow Moon.” I found out that she has recorded “Big Yellow Moon” but hasn’t released it yet, because she wants to release it with a video. That makes me excited, because I have loved that song from the first time I heard it. She sang the first song on her Christmas album, “Peace on Earth to Me.” She sang her own “I Just Knew,” which blows “Mary Did You Know” out of the water. She finished with “Silent Night.” After the show, she gave all of us in attendance (six of us, plus Todd and Erin, the radio personalities) a copy of her Christmas CD. I already had it, so I gave it to my mom. I think it was the fourth time I’ve seen her in person. I really think she’s underappreciated. You should go check out some of her stuff on cheriecall.com.

Despite the gingerbread, the wassail, the fruitcake, the candy canes, the hot chocolate, and the oranges, this isn’t going to be a very traditional Christmas. I am writing this in a Nevada hotel room because we are going to visit my brother’s family in California. We had a small Christmas yesterday since we wouldn’t be home. I got a new laptop, since I’ve had my current one for three years, and who knows how long my sister used it before that. I prefer to celebrate holidays at home, but it will be a new experience.

Merry Christmas!

The end of my first fall semester

Well, fall semester 2012 has come to an end.

It was my first ever fall semester. It was a good one. I took 15.5 credits while working 10 hours a week, which is the most I've ever done. I conducted linguistic research and experiments, gave a presentation on Irish English, learned about substantive editing (kind of), wrote a paper about penguins, and got a free trip to Death Valley.

I started off the semester getting sick, decked the living room with all sorts of Halloween things in September, made an Obama jack-o-lantern to protest the political sign of my apartment complex, got mad at a certain tarantula for listening to Christmas music before Thanksgiving (among other things), and had five finals along with four final projects.

After I finished up all my finals on Wednesday, I went to go to a caroling activity at the house of the first counselor in my bishopric. I think the Jensens are the nicest people on the planet. Since my aloof roommate didn't want to go, and the tarantula and the elders quorum president weren't home, I went by myself. And I was the only person who showed up! The Jensens gave me goodies (I explained to them why I could only eat the gingerbread cookies and not the pumpkin cookies) and I talked with them for a while. Brother Jensen had a trailer with hay bales all ready, and I was the only one. So after a while, he got in the truck and I got on the back with Sister Jensen and their son. We dropped off their son at the church and picked up a little deacon who only wanted to sing army spoofs of Christmas songs--things like "Jingle Bombs" and other violent twelve-year-old-boy-type songs. He seemed kind of disappointed when we took him home, but I was glad not to sing those un-merry songs. Overall there wasn't a whole lot of caroling done, but it was still fun.

Then Thursday I did a final run in Provo (since I didn't do a lot of running this semester outside of my jogging class) before coming home.

Then Friday night I went to a birthday party for my mission companion Elder Love, whom I had in my favorite area at my favorite time of year. We went bowling. It was a long game; there were nine of us on one lane. Once I got nine pins, but then the tenth mysteriously disappeared. On another occasion the person ahead of me got a pin in the gutter. I got a gutterball and knocked the pin out of the gutter, knocking down more pins. Best gutterball ever.

I also had some really weird dreams this week; I usually do on days I get to sleep in. I dreamed that there was a temple parking lot with angled parking in the wrong direction, that Lady Gaga was only like three feet tall, and that there was a beautiful house that wouldn't sell because an old man was brutally murdered inside it and because it had lava continually flowing through it--you had to move it or else it would form basalt all over the carpet.

December is sure sneaky. I still have to do some Christmas shopping. The good thing about not having any friends is that it's fewer gifts I have to buy!

But I am enjoying having no responsibility. I've wasted some time with my friend Mario in 32 bits, and last night I lazily ended up watching all of Cinderella on TV. (Why can't they make movies like that anymore?)

I was going to make this post more organized and more profound. But I guess the laziness of having no responsibility got to me.

Lucky; or, A Drinking Fountain Epiphany

I had a lot going on this week that had me feeling lucky.

I've had four final projects due this week. Four projects wouldn't be so bad if they were replacing final exams. But all of them are in addition to final exams.

I had to do projects for ELang 273, Empirical Methods in English Linguistics, and ELang 468, Varieties of English. I was lucky enough that I was able to do one project for both of these classes. If I had to do different ones, I don't know if I would have been able to get everything done. I analyzed gender differences in punctuation on Facebook. I got a perfect score on my paper for 273. I added a few paragraphs and a few references to make the paper long enough for 468. I'm hoping that since it was perfect for 273, it will be good enough for 468.

My other papers were for Editing and Geomorphology. I had to edit a paper for five hours and then write a report about it. I had asked my roommate if I could edit one of his papers, but he didn't have it done in time, so he asked one of our home teachees if I could edit a paper of hers. She gave me one. And after I edited it for five hours (all in one day), I found out it's an outdated paper. Oh well. At least it's over. I don't think I did a very good job on the paper, but at least it's over.

I was really worried about Geomorph (that's what all the cool geology people call it). On Monday I went into the geology lab to work on the project, not knowing what I was going to do. We had to measure things and write about what we learn. My thought was, "What will I be able to write about just from measuring stuff?" So I measured a bunch of the cinder cones around Mt. Etna. And I made a discovery! The biggest cinder cones, which are probably the youngest, are the furthest west, which means that the stratovolcano is probably gradually shifting to the east, which is supported by some of the literature I found. I was luckily able to finish it, and it was definitely long enough. I don't know how good it is (it definitely sounds more like a paper from the College of the Humanities, instead of the College of Physical and Mathematical Sciences), but hopefully it's good enough.

I'm worried about finals, because all these projects mean that I haven't been able to do much finals studying. I was thinking, mostly joking, "Why do I do this to myself?"

But then I had a drinking fountain epiphany, and I realized that thinking thoughts like that is a terrible thing to think.

I was done with a class on Monday, and whenever I pass a drinking fountain, I like to take a drink. I passed one fountain, but there was only one fountain at this location. There was a girl filling up her water bottle, and I didn't want to wait, and I thought about how if I had a water bottle with me, I would have also filled mine up. After all, my tuition pays for me using the water.

But then I realized that I don't pay tuition! This semester I have both a scholarship and a federal grant. I say this not to brag, but simply to say how lucky and blessed I feel. I'm getting a free education. How can I possibly say "Why do I do this to myself?" I'm extraordinarily lucky! And since my grant exceeds the amount I needed for tuition, it covers other things as well. So in addition to a free education, I'm getting free room and board.

But the luckiness doesn't stop there. I don't just get to go to classes for free; I get free access to all of the university's facilities. Not only do I get drinking fountain privileges, I get to use the university's computers, the library and its services (like voice recorders), the geology rock and stream table labs, the beautiful grounds, the piano classroom, the tax-exempt food and school supplies, and the exercise facilities (although I'm fat and lazy so I don't use those. But I could.) All of this is for free! (Well, I have to pay for food and school supplies, but I don't have to pay for them to be tax exempt.)

I even got a free, all-expenses-paid trip to Death Valley!

I'm lucky I got the grant. Earlier this year, when I was applying for scholarships, I thought I might as well apply for a grant, but I didn't expect to get one. It seemed to be a lot of work, so I just decided to forget about it. But because I didn't have it complete, it was going to affect my scholarship processing. So I wanted to just withdraw the FAFSA application, but that was going to be more difficult than just fulfilling it.

I was surprised when I got a grant! Apparently I'm so ancient (can you believe I'm 24?!) that my parents' income no longer plays a factor into grant processing. I don't know if I'll apply for a grant again. Sure, I like it, but I don't feel it's ethical when there are other people who are worse off than I am. We'll see what happens.

This weekend my ward had an auction to raise money for a middle-aged woman whose husband left her with four kids. She works full time and goes to school full time and is having a hard time making ends meet. Our auction raised over $1000 for her! I offered editing papers as an item to auction, since I don't really have any other talents. I bought some homemade beanies. I'd say how much I spent, but then I feel like a miser, considering how lucky I am. But I did spend more money than the hats are worth. And I don't even wear hats!

I am a very selfish person. Considering all the blessings I have, I need to be more generous. 

Two boring stories

This week I happened to meet up with people in the most random places.

There is this girl named Mariah who is a geology major. Back in 2010, when I was taking my Dinosaurs! class, I went with my professor out to Dinosaur National Monument to assist with his fossil excavation. Mariah was working there that summer, and I met her there.

Then during winter semester earlier this year, I sat next to her in my piano class. I knew she seemed familiar, but it took a while for it to click how I knew her. I'm really surprised it did click, because although I have a good memory, I have a really hard time remembering faces. (There's a girl in my ward whom I met probably ten times in two or three months because I never remembered her face.)

Then this semester I found out she's kind of a big shot in the geology department. One day in class, our professor showed pictures from a geology trip and several students in the class recognized Mariah in the picture. Except that it wasn't Mariah, it was just another student who wore a similar hat. And then the geology computer lab had a sign on the door having people guess where she was going to be called on her mission.

I was surprised that people knew her because of geology, but I knew her through other means. The first time I met her it was because of geology, but it was before I took it seriously. And then my piano class of course had nothing to do with geology.

This week I was in the geology computer lab, starting my final project. I really don't like having to do this project. I've really liked Geomorphology, except for this project. I have to look at a picture of a volcano, Mt. Etna, and analyze it and measure things and provide images and write a paper about it. I can analyze images (I correctly guessed that it started out as a silicic volcano but has changed to be basaltic) and I can write papers, but I don't know how to do this project. Anyway, Mariah came in to the lab that day and said hi to all the geology people. But I didn't say hi because I didn't think she'd remember me, and because I'm kind of an outsider in geology. The major is so small that everyone knows each other, especially since they've gone to labs and field trips with each other. (I actually wrote a short linguistics paper about the pragmatics of the geology department.)

On Thursday I had to go to the English Learning Center to administer a test/experiment to an ESL student (I conducted an experiment about transition words--I think too many ESL students are taught to use them without quite understanding how to use them). It's fairly far away from the useful buildings on campus (and by useful, I mean the buildings most people use), but I had to walk, because I didn't know if I would be able to park there, and because I don't dare own a bike in Provo. (I wish bicycle thieves would get run over by cars, preferably with the wheel going over their head.) After I left the building, I happened to see this Mariah coming from the Museum of Paleontology. We were both heading the same direction, so I talked to her about geology classes. I hope she wasn't creeped out that I knew her name when she didn't know me; she didn't seem creeped out, and I did, of course, explain how I knew her.

Then last night I went into the geology computer lab. She was the only one in there at the time, although many more jolly geology people came later. I worked for three hours on my project. I didn't do the project itself, but I did lots of research (and wrote about it) so that I filled up an entire page of references. Our project has to be five single-spaced pages, but other things count for the five pages, so having a page full of references means one less page to write! Maybe that's a lazy way to go about it. But I did have to work hard to get that page full of references.

Since my window for eating Christmas desserts is so narrow, I try to take advantage of it while it lasts, and I learned that Arby's has these peppermint shakes, so when I was out doing my errands yesterday, I decided to go there for lunch. When I paid, I remembered why I don't go there. I can get cheaper food and better food and healthier(ish) food and closer food by going to Subway or J-Dawgs. But Subway and J-Dawgs don't have peppermint shakes, so there I was at Arby's, the only time I've ever been to that one, when my former roommate Jeff Clegg walked in! We were flatmates my first year here. He has now graduated and is married, but his wife still goes to school, so he still lives in Provo and works in Salt Lake. He happened to be getting his car fixed right then, and it just so happened that Arby's was one of the closest places to walk while his car was getting fixed. He said he was surprised that I ate there, but I told him that it was the first time I'd ever been there, and he said he doesn't eat there often either. It sure was surprising we both happened to be there at the same time.

It sure took me a long time to tell two uninteresting stories...